Thinking of You
by Shimmerleaf
Summary: No one knows where N went after being defeated and no one cares, except for her. Touko is determined to find him again and tell him about her feelings. A collection of alphabet oneshots.
1. Anguish

A is for Anguish

"Believe in them, and walk whatever paths to fulfill them! And someday, surely your dreams shall be realized! Well then... Farewell!"

She couldn't, and refused to, blink. Even if she closed her eyes for one second then he would be gone. It was hard to believe, even though it was happening right in front of her. He was truly leaving.

N mounted Reshiram, giving Touko one last smile, a smile that seemed to radiate sadness and regret, before flying away into the pitch black night. Even Mother Nature refused to lighten up the situation; all the stars hanging in the sky were covered by grey clouds.

She stood still, unable to move, until Reshiram had flown out of sight. Only then did she run, dashing to the edge of the pathway. The giant hole that Reshiram had created when it entered the castle was the only evidence remaining that it had been there. Her eyes scanned the dark sky, hoping to catch a glimpse of the vast white Pokémon; at least then she would have a vague idea of where N was headed. However, the sky was just an immense mass of darkness; no stars and no moonlight, everything was covered by clouds.

Touko's legs slid out from under her due to exhaustion and she sat on the floor, staring at the gaping hole. Her gaze eventually wandered from the sky toward the carpeted floor. A sparkle of light reflected off of something on the carpet, catching Touko's attention. Reaching out her hand, she grasped the object and stared. It was the keychain N always had on him!

Clutching the keychain in her hand, she closed her eyes as her heart began to beat faster and memories resurfaced. N had never actually told her what the keychain meant or why he always carried it, only saying it was a souvenir. He had even offered to give it to her, that day on the Ferris wheel, before he told her he was the King of Team Plasma.

Hearing him say that had hurt her deeply; she hadn't known how to respond. Without knowing, she had given him her trust, placing it delicately in his hands, and he had thrown it out without a second glance back. She had enjoyed talking to him as it provided a way for her to get to know him more and to understand the reasons behind wanting to liberate all Pokémon. When he told her he was the King of Team Plasma, she felt betrayed; that she was only an obstacle that he needed to remove in his quest of liberation. She couldn't believe that she had started to consider him as a friend...

"Touko, are you all right?"

Her bright blue eyes snapped open and looked around, absorbing her surroundings. For a fraction of a second, she had forgotten where she was and what had happened. Turning her head, she spotted Cheren hurrying toward her, worry etched into the lines of his face.

Slowly, she got up off the ground, clutching the Keychain tightly and moved toward Cheren. Somehow it felt hard for her to move, as if her legs were dragging two cinderblocks with them. An odd feeling of pain pounded in her chest as teardrops formed in her eyes.

"Did N hurt you Touko?" Cheren demanded as she stopped before him, shoulders shaking with unshed tears.

She shook her head and kept silent, looking back at the hole in the wall. "He's gone, Cheren. He didn't even bother telling me where he planned to go."

Disdain immediately filled his navy blue eyes and his mouth curved into a frown. He never trusted N, not even before N had told Touko the truth. Cheren had found N strange and his ideals peculiar. He had only believed strength was what was needed to win Pokémon battles until he met Alder. Now that he learned there was to life to just winning Pokémon battles, he still couldn't understand N's reasoning. Cheren learned that some people, like him, grew together with Pokémon. When one becomes stronger, so does the other.

He knew Touko never agreed with N's ideals in the first place, that much he figured but he couldn't figure out why she cared for him so much. After all, it was because of N and his ideals that Bianca had her Musharna taken away in the first place.

"C'mon Touko, everyone is waiting for you back at the Pokémon League," Cheren stated. Alder had already left with Ghetsis, leaving him to get Touko.

"I'm not going, Cheren. I want to stay here for a while longer," Touko replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

He was torn between letting her stay and forcefully taking her with him. Why would she still want to be here, after all that had happened?

"Please Cheren. I'll meet you back at home, I promise," she added, a pleading tone beneath her unemotional sounding voice.

Reluctantly, Cheren walked down the flight of stairs and left Touko alone in the Castle. The rooms that once held many Plasma grunts were now abandoned, having fled when Ghetsis was captured and N flew away.

Only the sound of the wind echoing around the empty room filled the silence. She didn't speak or move, only standing there, staring.

"_Why did you have to leave? Alder has forgiven you; once people know that Ghetsis was the one behind the entire scheme, they'll surely forgive you. Please come back, N!"_

Silently, tears started running down her face as she continued staring at the dark empty sky, her hold on the Keychain becoming tighter and tighter. It made no sense for her to feel this way, did it?

She knew the truth about her feelings toward N but she didn't want to face them. It wasn't possible! How did she end up falling for N? No, that wasn't it either. She loved him, still loves him and it hurt to know she'll never see him again.

They never were friends, were they? Touko felt extremely confused. Falling to the floor, she sat and cried, letting all her bottled emotions out. He had betrayed her but she fell in love with him. How does that even work out?

It didn't matter now, though. He was gone, never to be seen again. She didn't know where he had disappeared to. There was an extremely slim chance of her ever finding him.

More tears rolled down her cheeks, carving a river into her pale face. Her heart throbbed and each breath she drew in felt more like a gasp. Her free hand wandered from its position on the floor over to her hip, unhooking a Pokéball. She didn't want to go anywhere but she had promised Cheren she'd meet him back at home...

Holding the Pokéball in front of her, she noticed the gleam of it and saw it was an Ultra ball, the one that housed Zekrom. Looking at it shot her back into the past as the memories of the battle she had with N replayed themselves. It had been a long and hard battle but in the end she had won, thanks to Zekrom. N hadn't appeared to be upset when he lost. He seemed shocked more than anything. Maybe that was why he hadn't reacted in any way when Ghetsis insulted him and called him useless. Even though she hadn't been the one being addressed, Touko felt hurt hearing those words coming from Ghetsis, especially since it was directed at N, his son.

A hiccup forced its way out of her and she forced the memory away, backing it into a corner. Now was not the time to remember! Replacing Zekrom's Pokéball, she grabbed another one and released Unfezant. The proud Pokémon spread her wings and cocked her head, looking at Touko intently.

"Can you take me to Nuvema Town?" Touko asked, forcing a smile onto her lips. Her Pokémon nodded and flew into the empty spot where Reshiram used to be, waiting for Touko to get on. With one last glance at the Castle, Touko climbed on top of Unfezant and they flew away into the night.

_N..._

**A/N: I hope everyone reading this enjoyed it or at least didn't hate it. This is my first fanfic in the Pokémon section so please, don't judge me too harshly? **

**I apologize if any of the characters are OOC; if you tell me, I can (attempt to) fix it. **

**(Edit) I just checked this oneshot over and noticed some mistakes that slipped past me. I fixed them now :)**

**Happy Leafing~ **


	2. Brave

B is for Brave

Bright lights flooded her vision as she slowly opened her eyes. Flinching slightly at the harsh sunlight streaming in through the windows, she sat up in her bed. Looking around, she felt confused as to why she was back in her room at home instead of in a Pokémon Center where she usually spent her nights during her travels.

Getting out of her bed, she realized she was in her pyjamas and all her belongings were neatly laid out on the table. Walking over, she saw all six of her Pokéballs plus her cap sitting there, along with...

She gasped and stared at the keychain, gently touching it with a finger. Memories of yesterday rushed back into her mind and she fell backwards, onto the floor, out of breath.

So it wasn't a dream after all, it was the truth. N truly was gone... A fresh wave of tears washed over her as she sat there, doing nothing.

The sound of footsteps echoed through the stairwell before two people barged into her room. The pair of them stood by the stairs and stared at Touko as she remained oblivious to their presence.

"Do you think Touko knows we're here?" the female questioned.

The male sighed, "She should, now that you opened your mouth."

She frowned at him before walking over to Touko, placing a hand tenderly on her shoulder. "Touko, are you all right?"

"It was all a dream, wasn't it? Tell me it is, Bianca!" Touko sobbed, her back hunched over, hiding her face. N's keychain lay on the floor, having fallen along with Touko.

Bianca grimaced and attempted to give Touko a hug, wrapping her arms awkwardly around the brunette while giving pointed looks at Cheren.

He wasn't paying attention to Bianca though; his gaze was fixated onto the fallen keychain. His navy blue eyes narrowed into slits and a fierce anger filled him. How could Touko care so much about N, after all that he's done? N was the source of all the hurt she was feeling at this moment and he wanted nothing more than to hurt N for being so. That wasn't possible though, as no one knew where he went.

Every time Cheren saw Touko cry, he wanted to stop her tears and to see her infectious smile. After all, whenever she saw him upset, she would always try to cheer him up.

"C'mon, Touko, there's someone downstairs waiting for you," Bianca informed, hoping to get Touko to stop crying.

Touko looked up, eyes glistening with tears. "Is it...?"

"It's not," Cheren replied bluntly. "Just go down and see who it is, Touko. Your mom is worried about you too."

Reluctantly, Touko got up off the ground, making sure to pick up the fallen keychain and laying it back onto the table next to her Pokéballs. Keeping her head low, she walked down the stairs, closely followed by Cheren and Bianca.

xxx

Fingering her Pokéballs, Touko stared out her window, thinking. Not counting Ghetsis, there were six Sages on the loose that she was supposed to find. Looker never specified the details but it had sounded like she was the only one capable of finding them. Bianca and Cheren had left, albeit unwillingly, after Looker had dismissed them, saying what he had to say was top secret information only meant for Touko's ears.

She didn't want to leave, though. She didn't want to go anywhere, there was no place new for her to explore. During her adventure, she had journeyed through all of Unova, gaining gym badges and making new Pokémon friends.

Cheren had told her about the routes on the other side of Nimbasa City and White Forest, about places she had never been to. Touko didn't feel any excitement coursing through her instead she only nodded to signify she had heard him.

Should she go look for the Sages? There was no one around to answer that question for her besides herself. She couldn't ask her Pokémon, they'd gladly go wherever she wanted to go, and she knows that.

The keychain, that keychain again... She couldn't help but glance at it every once in a while and every time, her gaze would linger and her heart would start beating faster. An odd feeling would arise in her stomach and waves of sadness would flow through her.

The Unova region appeared quite small on a map and since she had travelled through most of Unova, she had to agree. The region wasn't large and there weren't that many places N could be...

Maybe, just maybe, on her search for the Sages, she could find N!

She didn't know where that thought came from. The probability of him still being in Unova was slim and chances of her finding him were even slimmer. She was just setting herself up, only to fall down again.

Thoughts swirled around through her mind and she still couldn't figure out if she should go and look for the Sages or not. It didn't matter to her either way. If she wasn't willing to go, Looker could probably find someone else, like Cheren to do it.

"Sage, Pansage!"

One of her Pokéballs had rolled off her table, releasing Pansage. The grass monkey smiled up at Touko and sat next to her, looking content.

"What do you think, Pansage? Should I go look for the Sages and help Looker? I just want to see N again," Touko murmured.

"Pansage, sage, pansage," he said happily, pointing a finger toward the table.

Looking in the direction that Pansage was pointing to, Touko realized that he was pointing towards the keychain.

"You think I should go look for the Sages?" Touko asked.

The grass monkey shook his head, a smile on his face.

"I should go look for N?" she asked again, a frown on her face. This was one of those times she wished she could understand what her Pokémon was saying. If N was here then he could translate for her...

Again, Pansage shook his head.

"Then what should I do?" she questioned, a look of desperation evident in her eyes.

The monkey walked up to her, looking into her eyes and replied, "Pansage, sage!"

Oddly enough, Touko seemed to understand him and offered him a sad smile. There was only one thing that would make her truly happy and that was seeing N again. With no idea of N's location, Touko decided to look for the Sages and hopefully gain information about N's whereabouts or find him along the way.

With her mind made up, she grabbed the rest of her Pokéballs, returned Pansage and walked down the stairs, making sure to take the keychain with her. After all, it belonged to N and it was only right to return it to him.

_N..._

**A/N: Like before, I apologize if any of the characters are OOC, I'm not very good at characterization. I know this oneshot doesn't fit the word **_**brave**_** much but this was what I ended up with. I hope you like it though! Any reviews/comments will be welcomed.**

**Happy Leafing~!**


	3. Challenge

C is for Challenge

"Just a little farther, Unfezant, and then you can take a rest. Can you fly a bit lower?"

"Unfe," the proud bird Pokémon replied before flapping her wings and flew lower so her wingtips gently touched the water, causing many ripples to form across the smooth blue surface.

Hugging the delicate Pokémon egg closer to her body, Touko watched as the sea slowly gave way to land. It had been a long time since she last took in nature's beauty. The past few months she had been focused on winning gym battles and getting to the Pokémon League. When that was over, she was preoccupied with thoughts about N.

It was only yesterday when she decided to set out on a search for the remaining six Sages, as per Looker's request. She hadn't wanted to do it but Pansage had managed to change her mind, telling her to do whatever it took to make herself happy. At least that was what she hoped he had said.

"Unfe, fezant!" Unfezant cried, bringing Touko out of her thoughts and back to the present. Flapping her wings once more, Unfezant landed on the sandy soil and stood still so Touko would have an easier time dismounting.

"Thanks Unfezant, have a nice rest. Return!" In a flash of red light, Unfezant was returned to her Pokéball, leaving Touko standing on the edge of the ocean, holding the egg.

She had managed to find Sage Rood at the end of Route 18, which was an accident. Having never been down that route before, her Pokémon had wanted to explore it thus leading her there. Finding one of the Sages and receiving a Pokémon egg for free were just a bonus.

Carefully putting the egg in the nook of her arm, Touko took out her map, wondering where she should go next.

Accumula Town was quite small and there weren't that many places that were isolated from the people while Striaton City had the Dreamyard. From her last visit to the Dreamyard, she knew that not many people visited the area and that it had a lower floor, which hardly anyone knew of, making it the perfect hiding place.

* * *

Three Sages down, three more to go and she was only in Nimbasa City and nowhere near finding out where N had gone. Every time she confronted a Sage, her heart would start beating faster, until Looker showed up and led them away. After hearing three Sages talk about Team Plasma, she had still yet to learn anything about N. Maybe it would be best to give up her search for N...

Why was she even looking for him in the first place? She loves him but his feelings for her were unknown. If he were to say he doesn't feel the same, she would most likely be crushed. Even if she were to find him, what could she do? Tell him her feelings and hope the two of them could spend the rest of their lives together? As if.

If N wanted to be found, then he most likely would've been found already. A person flying on a vast white Pokémon isn't an easy sight to miss. For all she knew, N could've left Unova and this entire search would be pointless

Letting out a sigh, Touko sat down on one of the park benches lining the sidewalks of Nimbasa. She was being too hard on herself and thinking too much. Grabbing one of her Pokéballs, she released Pansage.

"What do you think I should do, Pansage? Should I give up looking for N and focus on helping Looker find the remaining Sages? I don't even know what I want anymore," Touko stated sadly.

The grass monkey looked up at his trainer and frowned. Hopping up onto the bench, he wrapped his arms around her and attempted to give her a hug. "Pansage sage, pansage."

"I know I love him, I'm sure of that but it hardly means anything. He told me to do whatever it takes to fulfil my dreams but I'm not even sure what they are anymore. Before this all started, Cheren and I both wanted to be the strongest trainer in all of Unova, him more so than me. I don't want that anymore, it just doesn't seem important," she murmured to Pansage.

"I wouldn't mind settling down somewhere and just enjoy life while occasionally having Pokémon battles. At least then I won't be worrying about the future but I know a part of me will always regret giving up on being a strong trainer. I don't know anything anymore."

"Sage," Pansage mumbled, gently petting his trainer on the shoulder.

Touko could feel tears forming in the back of her eyes and she started blinking furiously, feeling pathetic for wanting to cry. She had shed many tears over the course of the past week and enough was enough. If only her feelings would listen to reason...

xxx

An hour had passed and Touko remained on the park bench, letting her thoughts and feelings take over. Pansage and all her other Pokémon, minus Zekrom, were wandering around in the Amusement Park. They were reluctant to go; the Amusement Park provided no entertainment for them while their trainer wallowed in unhappiness but they went nonetheless.

"Want to battle?"

Surprised by the sudden voice, Touko let out a small yelp before lifting her head. Her eyes met a pair of cinnamon brown eyes and she resisted the urge to run away.

"H-hello Touya, it's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Yeah, I haven't seen you since I left on my journey," he answered, smiling at her. Touko could see that the smile was faked. It was just a mask to hide his concern for her. He was definitely not the first one to try that tactic.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, eager for him to leave. She was sure he knew the reason behind her sadness but she didn't want to explain. Fighting her feelings had drained all her energy.

He shrugged his shoulders. "It had been a while since I came to Nimbasa City so I thought I'd come for a visit. Besides, my Pokémon like to play in the Amusement Park," Touya added with a smile, a _real _smile.

Touko nodded her head but didn't say anything back.

"So, would you like to battle?" Touya asked again.

"I-I'd rather not," she replied.

"C'mon Touko, I haven't ever had a battle with you. You got to at least give me a chance!"

"Pansage sage!" A chorus of Pokémon cries followed the grass monkey's, surprising their trainer.

"See, Touko. Your Pokémon wants to battle too. So, what do you say?"

xxx

"Go, Archeops!"

The first bird Pokémon let out a stern shout and flapped his wings, sending up dust clouds. Touya had led Touko to the battlefield in the back of the Pokémon center after she had reluctantly accepted his challenge.

Once they were on opposite sides of the field, Touya wasted no time and released his Archeops while Touko stood there, staring.

Seeing Archeops sent her brain into overdrive, digging up old memories, especially those of her last battle with N. He had also used an Archeops against her.

Touko's hand automatically reached for a Pokéball and threw it, releasing Pansage.

"Archeops, use Crunch!" Touya commanded.

The bird Pokémon flapped his wings again and dived toward Pansage with his mouth wide open, showing his sharp teeth.

"Dodge it then use Acrobatics!" Touko directed, watching as Pansage easily step sided the attack before striking back.

Archeops let out a cry as he got hit and lost altitude. Touya called out another attack followed by encouragement.

Giving Pansage another command, Touko watched the battle continue. Somehow, it all seemed like déjà vu, as if she had already experienced this exact moment...

That's when it hit her. Her battle with N had proceeded the same way, with him sending out Archeops and her sending out Pansage. Even the attacks were similar. She shivered as thoughts about N resurfaced.

"Sage pansage pan!" the grass monkey called, struggling to stand back up.

"You can do it Pansage! Hit him with Seed Bomb," Touko instructed.

Pansage slowly got up and faced the smirking Archeops before letting out an array of explosive seeds from his mouth. The dodging command came too late and Archeops was hit in the face with the Seed Bomb, knocking him unconscious.

_It's just like the final battle with N..._

xxx

Both trainers were down to their last Pokémon and both their Pokémon were starting to show exhaustion. Touya was left with his Vanilluxe and Touko was left with her Zebstrika.

Touko knew that Zebstrika wouldn't be able to continue battling for much longer as she had taken a lot of damage, which was mostly Touko's fault. She was shocked that Touya decided to use his Vanilluxe and seeing him reminded her of the final battle with N, again.

In her battle with N, she was also down to her Zebstrika while he only had his Vanilluxe left. It was an odd coincidence that that happened to be the situation in this battle and it surprised her.

"Finish him off with Flame Charge, Zebstrika!" Touko directed.

The thunderbolt Pokémon let out a cry before surrounding herself in flames and charged at the snowstorm Pokémon.

"Vani!" Vanilluxe cried in pain as the attack made contact and he fell to the ground. Touya recalled his Pokémon, telling him he did a great job before smiling at Touko.

Her eyes, however, were glazed over, her mind elsewhere. Zebstrika trotted over to her and rubbed her muzzle against her arm, snapping Touko out of her thoughts.

A weary and sad smile forced its way onto her lips as she petted her Pokémon. "Thank you, Zebstrika. Return."

"That was a great battle; don't you think so, Touko? I should've challenged you earlier!" Touya exclaimed, his eyes dancing. After defeating Iris at Opelucid City he had yet to find an opponent that stood a chance against him. Battling Touko was the greatest challenge he ever had since.

"Yeah, it was a great battle," she replied vacantly.

Touya noticed the look on Touko's face and decided to leave her alone. "I gotta go heal my Pokémon in the Pokémon Center. I'll see you some other time then."

"Bye," Touko said softly. After Touya disappeared from her view she too walked into the Pokémon Center, giving her Pokémon to Nurse Joy to heal.

Walking back out into the noisy streets of Nimbasa City, Touko found a seat on one of the park benches and sat down. The end of the day was nearing and she was back where she was just hours before: sitting on one of the park benches and still undecided about what to do next.

She was aching to see N again and to talk to him, now more so than before. All she knew was that she was going to continue her search for the remaining three Sages and hopefully get information about N from them.

"_And someday, surely your dreams shall be realized!"_

Standing up from her seat, Touko glared at the sidewalk, annoyed with herself. Her dreams will be realized? The only thing she dreamed of now was a happy future, possibly with N.

_N..._

Her heart throbbed and she bit down on her lip, blocking her feelings of anguish from escaping. She was getting tired of feeling this sort of hurt whenever she thought about N, which happened to be almost every waking moment.

_Just don't think about him, Touko. It's not that hard. Think about finding the last three Sages. Where would they be? I wonder what they'll tell me when I find them. Maybe I'll get information about..._

Why was it so hard for her to stop thinking about him?

Walking back to the Pokémon Center, Touko thanked Nurse Joy and picked up her Pokémon. After strolled out the door, she leaned against the big building and closed her eyes.

Now what?

Taking a deep breath, Touko opened her eyes and started walking, heading to the gate. The next town would be Driftveil and the Cold Storage would be the perfect place for a Sage to hide, especially since she had encountered them there before the final battle with...

No, she was not going to think about it. If the Sages tell her something about N then she would be grateful, if they didn't then oh well. It was time for her to stop dwelling on it and move on, even though her heart ached.

Only three more Sages were left to be found.

**A/N: I apologize for the abrupt ending but I couldn't think of any other way to end it. Also, I know this doesn't exactly fit the prompt but I tried my best. This was my fourth attempt at C and this was the best. **

**Any reviews/comments will be welcomed**

**Happy Leafing~!**


	4. Dream

D is for Dream

He stood unmoving and helpless as he watched her get dragged away, her piercing screams filling the air. His father was next to him, watching the scene before them with a cruel smile, eyes glinting with malice.

As the Shadow Triad disappeared through the door, his father started laughing; laughter that filled the room, bouncing off the walls.

"What do you plan to do to Touko, Father?" he asked, a hint of sadness creeping into his voice. This was not going the way he had planned. He was hoping to defeat Touko and show her his ideals of a world where Pokémon were free from harm. Instead, Ghetsis had instructed for her to be locked up as letting her "roam free" would wreak havoc to Team Plasma's plans. Terror and dread had showed in Touko's eyes as the Shadow Triad pulled her away, which chilled him to the bone.

"Nothing you need to worry about, N," Ghetsis replied with a flick of his hand, dismissing the topic. "Come."

N followed his father out of the room and out into the grand hallway before turning into another room with a big window. Standing in front of the window, Ghetsis instructed N to watch.

Outside of the castle, on the ground and in the air, were Pokémon glaring angrily at the castle. There were five of them in total. To N, they appeared to be similar to the Pokémon he had just battled.

"Father, are those-!"

"Yes they are," Ghetsis replied as his lips curled up into a vindictive smile. "Tomorrow, you will address the public and instruct them to release _all _their Pokémon." His mind was already at work, planning and scheming. He was so very close to his goal and his senseless son had no idea of what he had in mind. Of course, he had already taken Zekrom from the dumb girl, keeping the legendary for himself.

A loud _smack _against the window drew both N's and Ghetsis's attention. An angry unfezant glared up at them as she flapped her wings, sending out blades of air. An array of bullets rebounded off the window, sailing through the air and crashing into the ground which shook and rumbled as a powerful Earthquake made contact. The castle quivered as an emboar repeatedly crashed into it with its flamed covered body. Thunder roared above as the result of a zebstrika's Thunderbolt. Water roused up from the ground as a stoutland used Surf.

N could sense the anger and infuriation radiating from Touko's Pokémon. They wanted to be back with their trainer, not out in the wilderness with her nowhere in sight. N was shocked to sense such intense feelings of loyalty. He knew Touko had a strong bonds with all her Pokémon and that they truly wanted to be with her and fight for her but seeing this surprised him.

"Unfe unfezant!" Unfezant cried, repeatedly using Air Slash on the window.

Ghetsis cackled and walked away, murmuring, "foolish Pokémon; they cannot break down the window or this castle. Soon they will be all _mine._"

N was left standing in the room, faced with seeing what he had done. It was his entire fault, wasn't it? His, that Touko's Pokémon had gotten released and she was locked up somewhere. He had only done what he thought was right, that Pokémon needed to be liberated to be happy but...

Touko's Pokémon looked far from happy. Their cries echoed anger, longing and worry. Looking directly out the window, N came face to face with Touko's Unfezant. She flapped her wings once and stared at him, boring her eyes into his.

"_Bring Touko back to us. You're doing more harm than good. If you want Pokémon to be happy then bring our trainer back to us!" _

* * *

N's eyes flew open and he gasped. The distress present in Unfezant's gaze was too much to handle. He could feel his heart pounding, still.

"Ar? Archeops."

Absentmindedly rubbing the top of Archeops' head, N reassured the first bird Pokémon that he was alright, that it was only a dream. _A dream..._

To him, it felt more like a nightmare. It was at _his_ hands that caused those five Pokémon to feel such pain. Why was he dreaming about that now, of all times? The battle with Touko had passed and even though it wasn't that long ago, it was over. He had lost and Touko had prevented the liberation of Pokémon. Ghetsis had been taken away by the Champion. For the people of Unova, everything was back to normal. So why was his mind showing him what _could've _happened if he had won against Touko? It wasn't important anymore.

"Archeops, ar," Archeops stated before landing next to N, on Reshiram's shoulder.

N looked around and seeing nothing but endless water, decided that Archeops was right. It would take a few more hours before they were to spot Unova. He desperately needed rest and that dream hadn't help calm him.

"Archeops." _I'll wake you up when we're near Unova. _

* * *

"This is what happens to trainers that refuse to listen to Team Plasma," Ghetsis announced triumphantly as the screen started playing a video.

Every television program had been interrupted just so Team Plasma's announcement could be played. A week had passed since Touko lost to N and Team Plasma's plans for Pokémon liberation had been put in motion.

The screen showed Touko sprawled out on the floor, endless tears falling from her eyes. A Plasma grunt stood in front of her, holding her Pokéballs. She reached for them but the grunt always managed to dodge her attempts. The grunt teased her by placing the balls within her reach before backing up. When Touko cried out loud, the grunt kicked her and retreated.

Ghetsis's face replaced the video and proclaimed that Team Plasma will take the Pokémon of trainers by force if they did not cooperate. A solemn look appeared on his face and he bowed before the original scheduled program popped back up on the T.V.

N glanced out the window of his room and frowned. Ever since he had defeated Touko and the order for trainers to release their Pokémon was sent out, N saw countless Pokémon running around looking lost and scared.

They had nowhere to go and weren't used to be free. They no longer had the instincts of a wild Pokémon and didn't know what to do.

A stab of pain would always flow through him every time he watched the liberated Pokémon. From what he knew as a child, humans only hurt Pokémon. The Pokémon that he had been in contact with carried many bruises and gashes, a result of being mistreated and abandoned by trainers.

A knock at the door broke N's train of thought and he looked at the door but not before something outside caught his attention. A lone ducklett was perched on the windowsill, holding its right wing up.

He ignored the knocking and walked over to the window, carefully opening it. Whispering soothingly to the ducklett, he slowly reached a hand forward, not wanting to scare it. The ducklett looked at N, as if analyzing him before hopping onto his arm.

"My lord N, Sage Ghetsis has left a message for you and wishes that, oh!"

N glanced over from the ducklett to the door and motioned for Concordia to close it. Running his hand along the top of the ducklett's right wing, he could feel the bones underneath. Everything about it seemed to be fine.

"Ducklett duck," the water bird Pokémon stated, flapping his wings once, showing N that he was fine. "Duck."

The ducklett flapped his wings again and flew out the window, heading to the south, leaving N feeling confused.

"Is something wrong, my lord N?" Concordia asked, watching him stare out the window.

"It's fine. What does my father want?" N replied smoothly.

"He wanted to know if you had time to visit Touko before she gets transported. The Shadow Triad was unable to locate Zekrom on her after taking her other Pokémon and Sage Ghetsis says he must get Zekrom before they move her."

"Alright, tell my father I'll go visit Touko," N replied before walking out of the room.

xxx

"I don't care what you do to me; I'll never give you Zekrom!" Touko shouted without as so much glancing at the person that entered the cell. She sat in the corner, facing the wall and with her back to the door. "Just leave me here to die!"

His heart throbbed hearing her say such words with venom lacing her tone. "I'd never let you die, Touko," N stated softly, pain etched into the lines of his face.

Ever since his first encounter with Touko, he had thought differently of her than all the other trainers. Perhaps it had to do with the fact that her Pokémon were willingly putting themselves in danger to protect her and they wanted to be with her on their own freewill although that fact could be true for many trainers, he was intrigued by her.

It was because of her that he found out how twisted Ghetsis really was. Even though Touko had lost in their battle, she had almost persuaded N to give up on his plan, to create a new one that didn't involve trainers releasing their Pokémon. Touko was so close to getting N to change his mind when Ghetsis revealed his plan to be the sole person to have Pokémon. There wasn't much N could do on his own and now he was still Ghetsis' puppet while Touko remained locked up, like a prisoner.

Her whole body froze and she let out a gasp at the sound of his voice. N walked closer to her, letting the door behind him swing shut as a Plasma grunt stood outside as guard.

"W-why are you here?" Touko exclaimed. He could see tears forming in her bright blue eyes as she stared at him but he didn't answer. If he told her Ghetsis had sent him then surely she would hate him.

"I asked you why you're here!" she repeated, her voice louder than before. N flinched; he wasn't used to her being so loud. Whenever he was with her before, the two of them would talk and her voice was always soft, as if she was trying to comfort him.

He didn't know how to reply as he couldn't tell her the truth. "I came to visit..."

Touko scoffed and rolled her eyes, her hands curling into fists at her side. "Oh you're so generous, _my lord N_, coming down to this small cell to visit me. I'm sure you have better things to do," she spat.

N didn't know how to react; he had never seen Touko like this before. "What happened to you, Touko?" he whispered.

Her light blue eyes narrowed and she glared at him. "You have your _father_ to thank for this. If it weren't for him then I wouldn't even be here! I'd be back home with my friends and my _Pokémon_!"

He opened his mouth to say something but no words came out, leaving his jaw hanging.

"You try being locked up without any access to the outside world. You try not being able to defend yourself as you're being assaulted and your Pokémon forcefully taken away. You try watching as your Pokémon are released into the wild and not being able to do anything about it. They weren't just Pokémon to me; they were my travelling companions, my best friends! Now they're all gone." She turned on him, eyes blazing. "I'll never tell you where Zekrom is. Kill me if you must but I'm taking this secret to the grave."

N could only stare at her as she went back to the corner of the cell, crouching down. To say he was shocked would be an understatement. He had never, in his right mind, imagined Touko was capable of saying such harsh words. He couldn't blame her for feeling this way though. If his friends were forcefully taken away from him he would feel the same but he couldn't figure out why she was lashing out at him.

"I could never kill you Touko. I'd never let _anyone_ kill you," N replied, sadness creeping into his voice. How could she think that he would hurt her? If he had known she was to be beaten in order for the Plasma grunts to retrieve her Pokémon he would've objected and protected her, but he hadn't known. Was it his fault that she was suffering?

"Just leave me alone." She still had her back to him but he could faintly see her shoulders shaking, as if her body was being racked by endless sobs. It pained him to see her like that.

* * *

A wingtip poked N gently in the shoulder and he opened his eyes, blinking them to get used to the dim lighting. The sun was starting to set, casting its rays all across the darkening sky.

Beneath him, N could feel the vast white Pokémon shifting, squirming as if uncomfortable.

"Are you alright, Reshiram? If you're tired we can find a place to stop and continue tomorrow."

"_I'm fine my lord. It's just..."_

"What is it, Reshiram?"

"_You have been moaning in your sleep. Also, you have been calling out _her _name a few too many times. Whenever that happens, I can feel your arm across my back, reaching for my mane as if you're trying to keep something from leaving."_

"I apologize for that," N said sincerely. The Pokémon didn't say anything back, waiting for N to continue. Instead, silence filled the air and N let his thoughts drift off as Reshiram continued flying.

He started to wonder where all those dreams about Touko had come from. A week or two had past (N had lost track of the days) since he had been defeated by her. Peace had come to Unova and Ghetsis was in jail. Everything was for the better now, so why was he dreaming of what could've been if he had won?

If his dreams truly showed what would've happened if he had won then N was glad he had lost. Seeing the tortured looks in the "freed" Pokémon's eyes sent shivers down his body and hurt straight through his heart. It pained him to know they were hurting so much and it was him that caused it.

An image of Touko from his dream flashed through his mind. His breath caught in his throat and his heartbeat increased. The look on her face haunted him now, the sorrow, the anger, the longing.

"_My lord, are you alright?"_

"...I'm fine, Reshiram. Are you positive you can keep this up? If you're tired we can stop and take a rest."

"_Yes, Unova is not that far from here. I will be in good health, my lord. You should get some rest," _Reshiram stated, glancing back to catch a glimpse at N.

* * *

"N, don't leave! Alder has forgiven you, I'm sure the rest of Unova will feel the same. Please!" Touko pleaded, watching the green haired teen walking nearer and nearer toward the hole in the wall where Reshiram was waiting.

"I need to leave, Touko. I need to realize my own dreams. All this time I've been used by my father to help him achieve what he wanted. I was manipulated and now I don't know what _I_ want anymore. I now know Pokémon are happy with their trainers, that the majority of trainers are kind to their Pokémon. I'm sorry Touko but I must go. We'll see each other again someday, surely," N replied as he backed away from her.

N faced the dark night and closed his eyes, letting his emotions wash over him. He felt conflicted on the inside. A part of him wanted to immediately climb aboard Reshiram and fly away while another part of him wanted to stay behind, to be with Touko. He didn't know where these feelings came from.

The hallway behind him was covered with a majestic red carpet and it muffled Touko's footsteps. She stayed quiet and before he knew what was happening, he found her arms wrapped around his waist, her head pressed up against his back. "Please don't leave," she begged. Her voice was muffled by his clothing, filling her plea with anguish and sadness.

His hands reached down to hers and he released them from his waist. Clutching her hands in his, N turned around and looked her in the face. Tears streaked her face and continued flowing from her bright blue eyes. "Don't go," she whispered.

* * *

"Archeops, ar!" N felt something poking him and cracked open his eyelids to see Archeops perched on Reshiram, next to him. _"We're here, lord N."_

Getting up from his position on Reshiram, N dismounted and headed up the familiar bridge. A pang of nostalgia hit him as he remembered walking up the bridge as a child, often accompanied by Concordia or Anthea.

Archeops flew next to his head, keeping a watchful eye on N at all times. Reshiram was content lying on the grass behind the Castle since N didn't believe in keeping Pokémon in Pokéballs.

Once he was inside the Castle, N wandered from room to room, checking them over. Ever since he had left, nothing had changed. Everything remained untouched and unmoved, as if once he left and Ghetsis was arrested, the entire Castle was frozen.

Eventually N ended up in _that_ room, the room where he had lost to Touko, the room that he last dreamt of and the room where he last saw Touko. His dream came rushing back to him and he stared at the hole in the wall. It was still there.

"_Do you plan to stand in this room for the rest of the day? If you are then I'm going to find Reshiram. I'm getting tired,"_ Archeops mumbled before flying out of the room through the hole, and out into the area behind the Castle.

As Archeops left, N walked out of the room and into his old playroom. Everything he had as a child were still in their respective places. For now, this was good enough. Even though he had fallen asleep three times on the way back to Unova, he still felt exhausted and he was reluctant to go search for a better sleeping spot.

* * *

Her eyes were downcast as she fiddled with the hem of her dress, a shy smile on her face. He stood in front of her and grabbed her hands, placing a kiss on each one. Her face erupted into a blush and she looked away.

Soft melodic music flowed through the air as the pianist and the violinist continued playing. The other instruments waited their turn join in. Taking her hand in his, he directed her to the dance floor. Putting one hand on her waist and holding the other up, he led her in a slow waltz.

They looked blissfully happy, there together, dancing. Eventually her head came to rest on his shoulder as they simply swayed to the music.

With the last note echoing through the room, he placed a kiss on her lips. She returned the kiss and the two looked at each other, smiling. "I love you."

**A/N: In case you can't tell, the end scene is a dream. Two bad dreams and two happy dreams, not bad, right? ;) **

**If any character seemed OOC please tell me and I'll attempt to fix it and please tell me if there are contradicting details in this.**

**I hope you liked this and all comments/reviews will be welcomed. On a side note, please don't expect all my other oneshots to be this long. **

**Happy Leafing~!**


	5. Embrace

E is for Embrace

She never expected herself to finish Looker's task so fast. It hadn't even been a month yet! In truth, it wasn't a hard assignment, it just involved her travelling around Unova (again) and looking for the Sages. Sage Giallo had to be the hardest one to find as he was in a peculiar location and in a place she had never travelled to before. It didn't help that she had to climb up a waterfall.

Now, all the Sages, minus Ghetsis, were back in the custody of the International Police and the people of Unova could rest easy (but it wasn't like it affected them either way). With that job done, she found herself bored and unoccupied. There was nothing left in Unova that thrilled her.

All of her friends had found something to do. Bianca was working with Professor Juniper and Cheren was training under Marshal. Even Touya had found something to do with his time! He had decided to take on the trainers in the Battle Subway; his goal was to defeat the Subway bosses. She was the only one unsure of what to do with her life.

Touko sat on a bench outside the Nimbasa Amusement Park. It wasn't by choice that she was here, this city just happened to be the one closest to White Forest, the last place in Unova that she hadn't visited before.

Her thoughts drifted back to N. She couldn't help it! After apprehending the last Sage, Looker had told her that they, whoever _they _were, had spotted a person like N with a dragon Pokémon. After hearing that, Touko had gotten Unfezant to fly all over Unova, in hopes of seeing him, but she had found nothing. The little sliver of hope that Looker had given her when he said that slowly shrivelled up and died.

She had told herself, forced herself, to stop thinking about him, that it wasn't doing her any good. It had worked, for a few days, before she encountered a Sage and they would start talking about Team Plasma, causing her to think about N all over again.

Wherever N was, she just hoped he was happy, or at least at peace with himself and that he finally managed to figure out what he wanted to do with his life. _If only I could figure out what to do with _my _life..._

Touko thought about taking out her Pokémon to talk to them. There was nowhere in Unova she hadn't been to and she didn't feel like travelling to another region. Even though befriending new Pokémon and meeting other trainers held a certain thrill for people, her passion for battling seemed to have dwindled down.

At times like these, she couldn't help but hate herself. Her emotions would become erratic and unpredictable while her brain processed her thoughts at about ten thousand per second. It was as if she was a machine left covered in rust, nothing was functioning the way they should.

Before, when she didn't know any better, she often wished for a friend that could comfort her in her time of need, such as now. She wanted someone to talk to her, to soothe her worries and to tell her everything would be okay. Of course, no one in her life would ever fit that role. Bianca would most likely never understand her problems in the first place and Cheren would probably tell her to get over N. She couldn't blame him for feeling that way though; she knew he had never liked the green haired teen. Touya would attempt to cheer her up by battling but battling would only remind her of the past, which would lead back to N.

Telling her mother was out of the question. Even though Touko and her mother were close, she didn't feel right telling her about her feelings especially those for N. Everyone back in Nuvema Town had assumed she and Cheren would eventually get together. Where that idea came from, she didn't want to know.

On her journey, she had learned that that it wasn't possible to always have a friend at her side. Asides from her Pokémon, there will never be someone by her side at all times. Sure, if she were to call Bianca or Cheren on their Xtransceiver, they'd probably find her to comfort her or try to on the phone, but it wasn't the same.

N had managed to change all that. He always managed to make her feel better, to cheer her up. Even after he told her he was the king of Team Plasma, she still smiled whenever she saw him and got a chance to talk.

He would always lend her an ear and even when he didn't have any advice to offer her, she would always feel calmer afterward. No matter how much her Pokémon comforted her, they could never give her the same sense of peace that he did.

Looking into the horizon, Touko watched the setting sun and the different streaks of colour lighting the sky, signalling the end of another day. Already night was approaching and she had wasted another day. Fingering her Pokéballs, she unhooked Pansage's ball and called him out.

"Pansage pan," the grass monkey mumbled as he was released from his Pokéball, groggy from sleep. He looked around and noticed Touko staring at him, her eyes glazed over. "Pansage."

"Sorry for waking you, Pansage. I-I was getting a bit lonely," she replied with a sigh, her bottom lip jutting out in a frown.

"Pansage sage!" he stated, climbing up onto the bench and sitting beside his trainer. Like the last time Pansage saw Touko sad, he wrapped his arms around her and leaned against her side.

She patted his head and thanked him. Pansage smiled, playfully head butting Touko in the ribs. The two of them sat and watched as the sun sank lower and lower into the horizon, making way for the moon.

xxx

"Pansage," he whispered, poking Touko lightly in the shoulder. When she didn't move, he decided she must've fallen asleep. He was still at her side and his leaf was serving as a makeshift pillow for her. Even though spring was drawing near, the night was still chilly. Whenever a breeze swept passed them, Pansage could feel Touko shivering against him.

He knew she kept a blanket inside her bag but it was on the other side of her and if he moved then surely she would wake up. He didn't want Touko to wake up as he knew it would take her a day and a night before she would be able to fall asleep again.

Looking around his surroundings, Pansage saw Nimbasa City differently. Everything was bathed in darkness except for the few patches of light emitted from the street lamps. The noisy streets were now quiet as everything was closed and everyone asleep.

Another gust of wind blew past and Touko shivered slightly. Frowning, Pansage searched the area with his eyes, hoping to find something he could use to keep her warm. Even if he did find something, there was no way he'd be able to reach it without moving.

"Sage," he mumbled, disheartened that he couldn't find anything to keep her warm.

On the other side of Touko, all her Pokéballs, except for Pansage's, were still hooked onto her pants. One of them shook and a bright light flashed in the air, startling Pansage.

The proud Pokémon stretched her wings and flapped them once to get them moving again. Noticing her trainer sleeping against Pansage, she smiled and held in a laugh.

"Pansage pan?" _What are doing out of your Pokéball?_

"Unfe fezant." _I could ask you the same thing._

"Pan pansage," the grass monkey stated, pointing toward his leaf. _Touko wanted some company earlier then she fell asleep. _

Unfezant glanced at the two of them before climbing up onto the bench. Perching on top, she draped her wings over Touko's shoulders in an effort to keep her warm. "Fezant," she instructed before closing her eyes. _Get some sleep, monkey._

xxx

A low moaning sound startled the two sleeping Pokémon and they woke up, ears pricked and eyes alert. When they saw and heard nothing out of the ordinary, they turned their attention to their sleeping trainer. Touko moaned again and her mouth parted, calling N's name in a soft whisper full of longing.

"Pan pansage pan," he wondered. _I think she's having a bad dream._

"Unfezant unfe," she retorted, rolling her eyes. _Oh, I thought she's having a good dream. That's why she sounds like she's in pain._

"Please...no...N..." Touko murmured with her eyes screwed shut.

The grass monkey and the proud Pokémon turned their eyes on their trainer and sighed. This was probably the umpteenth time that Touko was calling out for N while asleep and there was nothing they could do to soothe her. They were just glad that she never remembered her dreams, or else Touko would feel even more depressed.

"I need you...I don't know anymore...my dream..." Touko whispered to the silent night. Pansage gently rubbed his trainer's arm and Unfezant rested her head on Touko's.

xxx

The darkness around them had alleviated a bit as night gave way to dawn. Sometime during the night, both Pansage and Unfezant had fallen asleep next to their trainer and Touko had stopped calling out in her sleep.

All was quiet, except for the occasional rustling of movement and the echoes of footsteps in the distance. The sound became louder and louder, piercing the silence as the person it belonged to walked nearer to Touko.

When he stood before her, he watched the outline of her chest rise and fall with each breath. Reaching out a hand, he resisted the urge to touch her and backed away. Pansage let out a laugh and smiled, turning a bit to the side but continued to sleep. He let out a breath of air that he didn't know he was holding in and sighed.

He knew he shouldn't have come, but it had taken all of his self discipline to not have looked for Touko earlier. Allowing himself to see her now was his present to himself and he couldn't take it anymore.

Ever since he came back to Unova, he had longed to see her again and to speak to her but he never found the courage. Even now, he was hiding in the shadows, letting himself see her while she was asleep so there was no chance of her seeing him. He couldn't face her, not yet.

His eyes went back to Touko's sleeping form and he smiled. She looked so peaceful for once, the tension in her shoulders that had been present during their last battle was gone and she looked relaxed.

She stirred and he froze, afraid of her waking up. When all was still again, he approached her once more, wanting to touch her.

"I love...you...N," Touko murmured, a wistful smile forming on her lips.

He paused and the corners of his lips turned up in a sad smile. Somehow he wasn't surprised to hear those words from her. Taking another step toward her, he kneeled so he was face to face with her sleeping figure.

Running his fingers through her hair, he let the loose strands slip through his fingers. Pushing the tresses that blocked her eyes behind her ears, he watched her sleep. Her chest rose with every inhale and sank with every exhale.

Her mouth parted and she called his name again. Her voice was soft and seemed to float on the air; he had to strain to hear her.

His chest ached when she spoke his name and he closed his eyes, letting his memories wash over him. He also remembered the dreams that had plagued him while he was sleeping on Reshiram's back. Those were, for the most part, anything but pleasant.

Noticing the darkness ebbing away and the sky filling with colour, he stood up and backed away, albeit reluctantly. Looking at Touko one more time, he fought the urge to go back to her side. Something inside of him was telling him to stay away from her, that he brought her enough pain already while another part was arguing against that, that he needed her by his side.

As his emotions clashed with one another, he walked back to Touko's side. Staring down at her, she looked peaceful and happy, but he could feel a lot of negative feelings within her.

The sky brightened even more as morning drew nearer and nearer. He bent down so his head was only inches from hers, even though Touko's face was at an angle. Acting on impulse, he placed his lips over hers for a brief kiss before backing away and walking back to where he had come from, flying away afterwards.

xxx

The bright sunshine shone down on Touko's face and she reluctantly opened her eyes, shielding them from the light. Looking around, she noticed that she was in Nimbasa... or to be more precise, on a bench outside the amusement park.

Feeling something soft and warm beneath her head, she turned and saw Pansage sleeping next to her and Unfezant above her, with her wings covering her shoulder.

Instead of shaking them off and waking them up, like what she would usually do, she closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of having her two dearest Pokémon with her in such a way.

As her thoughts drifted off, she thought back to last night. She could've sworn a person like N was here and...

Running a hand over her lips, she frowned and forced herself to remember. Someone like N had been here, with her, and they had kissed her... or was it all a dream?

Either way, she felt energized and happy, for once. New hope blossomed in her and she couldn't wait to leave Nimbasa and to go back to Nuvema, where she would plan out what she would be doing next. Somehow, she knew she was going to find N sooner or later, and she couldn't wait until that day.

**A/N: Apologies if this oneshot doesn't exactly fit **_**embrace**_**, I was running out of ideas D: At first, N wasn't even supposed to be in this oneshot at all. It was going to be Touko bonding with her Pokémon, but I couldn't figure out how to end it so I threw N in. You guys don't mind right?**

**I mostly focused on Pansage and Unfezant because they're my favourite Unova Pokémon and I think they're awesome. Also, I thought that the other Pokémon that she had on her (alluded to in **_**Challenge**_**) would be too big to fit on the bench. **

**Anyone want to take a guess as to what F would be? ;) **

**Happy Leafing~!**


	6. Ferris Wheel

F is for Ferris Wheel

Putting down the bags filled with souvenirs from the musical on a wooden bench outside the Amusement Park, Touko fished her ringing Xtransceiver out of her bag before answering it. Pansage climbed up onto the bench and sat down, letting out a tired sigh. Swinging his feet, he watched his trainer talk on the Xtransceiver before becoming bored and decided to dig through her bags of souvenirs.

Cheren's face appeared on the screen of her Xtransceiver and she greeted him timidly. The last time she had spoken to Cheren was when she had told him to leave her alone, at N's Castle. It seemed like a few days ago when in actuality it was a few weeks.

The corners of his lips twitched and curved downward slightly when Touko finally answered. Seeing his expression, Touko instantly felt guilty for not calling him or making time to talk to him earlier. Before she had left Nuvema Town to search for the Sages, she had run into Bianca and the two of them had chatted for a while. She would've talked to Cheren too but she hadn't seen him and her mind was preoccupied. Back then, nothing seemed to matter to her except N. Of course, N was still important to her but at any rate, he didn't occupy her mind at all hours of the day now. She felt at peace with herself and even though she didn't know what to do with the rest of her life, she wasn't worried.

"Touko," Cheren acknowledged with a dip of his head. His navy blue eyes stared at her and he remained quiet, as if waiting for her to start talking.

"I-is there some reason for you to call me?" Touko asked with a stammer. His intense gaze was making her nervous and as her memories began to resurface, she became even tenser. She remembered that Cheren had always despised N and he was the reason she had told Cheren to leave her alone the last time the two of them spoke. Touko knew either Touya or Bianca must've told Cheren about her and her spiral into disarray. After all, the four of them told each other (almost) everything.

"Why do you seem to be afraid of me?" he asked with a straight face, making it hard to tell what he was thinking.

Blinking her eyes, Touko forced a wavy smile onto her lips. "You're funny, Cheren. Why would I be scared of you? I was just surprised you called, that's all."

"Where are you right now?" he asked rather abruptly, not bothering to answer her question or to explain the reason behind the call.

"I'm in Nimbasa City. I had planned to go back home today but Pansage persuaded me to stay here for another day. He wanted me to 'enjoy the sights'," Touko quoted, a glimmer of amusement dancing in her bright blue eyes.

Cheren stared at her again, noting the look in her eyes. "I'll meet you in front of the Musical in twenty-five minutes."

She stared back at him with wide eyes and asked him why. He didn't reply and repeated what he said before hanging up. Sitting down on the bench dumbfounded, Touko placed her Xtransceiver back into her bag. She could've sworn she heard Cheren murmur a quiet "please" before he had hung up. Cheren wasn't a rude person but they were hardly ever polite around each other and they only used pleasantries when being sarcastic or when they were serious...

"Pan pansage!" the grass monkey stated. Noticing his trainer's confusion, he had stood up on the bench and grabbed her hand, pointing in the direction of the theatre. _The only way to find out what he wants is to go meet him._

xxx

"Touko."

She turned around and spotted the black haired trainer walking toward her. Smiling lightly at him, she waved and walked over to him while Pansage slowly followed, overwhelmed by the weight of the bags.

"So why did you want to meet with me here?" Touko asked when she stood in front of him. Since she had last seen him, Cheren had grown taller and his facial features were more defined. His hair had grown slightly longer and looked shinier too.

"No one has seen or heard from you in quite a while," he replied, still avoiding her question.

"And you decided to take action and find me?" she asked.

Cheren shook his head and looked away, sighing. "Touya told us he had a hunch that you were back in Nimbasa."

"Then why did you bother calling me?"

Her question was met with silence, making her uncomfortable. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other and glanced at Cheren's back. His behaviour confused her and she didn't know what to say. She would be glad to lend him an ear and listen to his problems and he knew that, so his silence bothered and baffled her.

When Cheren finally did turn around, his gaze caught hers and he stared at her. His eyes were clouded with...something that she couldn't identify.

Touko's mind started to rewind and she remembered seeing that same look on his face before. It was in Dragonspiral Tower after she had defeated Brycen and the two of them went in to rid the Tower of Team Plasma. The many Grunts had challenged Touko to Pokémon battles in which she easily won.

When she had neared the top, four Grunts took her on, one after the other and fatigued her Pokémon. Up against the last Grunt, it was her Zebstrika against his Krokorok. The thunderbolt Pokémon had taken many hits from the Grunt's Watchdog and was running out of energy. When the Grunt had called his Krokorok to use Mud Slap and then Crunch, Touko knew Zebstrika wouldn't be able to take both attacks. As Krokorok neared Zebstrika to use Crunch, she ran in front of the thunderbolt Pokémon and took the attack in her shoulder. This gave Zebstrika a chance to retaliate and she finished off the Krokorok with a swift Flame Charge.

Touko hugged her Pokémon before stumbling as her shoulder throbbed painfully. Somehow Cheren had magically appeared at her side and started scolding her for taking a Pokémon's attack. He had an unreadable emotion clouding his determined eyes as he chased away the Grunts and the Sage. She had smiled weakly at him before letting him examine her shoulder for any signs of bleeding.

Snapping out of her memories, Touko raised an eyebrow and stared questioningly at Cheren. "Can you give me an answer, Cheren?"

Closing his eyes, Cheren inhaled before opening them. Looking intently at Touko, he murmured, "I missed you."

Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped. Never in her life had she heard such words come from Cheren before. He was never the sort of person that showed their emotions, instead, he bottled them up. Touko only knew this fact since the first time she had seen him cry was back when they were six. Bianca and herself had cried many times before that and Cheren was always the one comforting them. Even as kids he didn't show his emotions easily.

"W-what do you mean by that, Cheren?" Touko asked, her voice wavering.

He turned and looked away from her, running a hand through his hair anxiously. "I missed talking to you, Touko. I missed when we would hang out. I missed _you_."

"I-I'm sorry Cheren. Maybe you can call Bianca and Touya and the four of us can hang out together again like when we were young?" Touko suggested, wanting to cheer Cheren up. She had never seen him like this before and it scared her.

"That's not what I meant," he replied with a shake of his head.

"Then what _did_ you mean?"

Cheren sighed and turned back to face her. "I love you, Touko."

"C-Cheren, y-you're not serious, are you?"

That was a rhetorical question and she knew it but she asked anyway. She found the entire situation to be unbelievable. The two of them, along with Bianca and Touya, had been friends ever since they had been kids. They knew almost everything there was to be known about each other. When one of them was upset, they would turn to the other for comfort. Touko considered them to be her best friends but she had never thought about their relationship going any further. Bianca was like the sister that she never had while Touya was like an eager little brother to her. Cheren, with his knowledge, was like an older brother to her. She never imagined Cheren as boyfriend material, to her, he was off limits and he never sent her heart racing.

He continued staring at her, waiting for her to say something. When Touko failed in delivering a response, he figured what her answer would be. "It's N, isn't it?" Cheren asked his voice tense and a hint of anger lingering beneath.

All Touko could do was stare at him with wide eyes. "W-what?" she stammered as a shiver ran up her spine, chilling her bones. "It's not like that, Cheren! I just... don't think of you like that. You're like a brother to me!"

"So that's how it is then," he replied. Turning to face the other way, he started walking to the gate leading out of Nimbasa.

"Cheren, wait!" Touko hurried after him, putting a hand on this shoulder to prevent him from leaving. He flinched as she made contact with him and she withdrew her hand. "W-we're still friends, right? I'd hate to lose you as a friend. You're special to me."

"We're still friends," Cheren replied but he didn't bother facing her as he said it. "See you later, Touko." With that said, Cheren left, leaving Touko standing there.

"I think I've hurt him badly," she murmured to herself. Guilt flooded her and she bit her lip. It wasn't her fault that she didn't feel _that_ way about him and she couldn't change her feelings.

"Pansage sage pan," the grass monkey advised. Hearing Pansage shocked Touko as she had forgotten all about him. The bags were at his side and he looked up at her with wide smile. _Don't dwell on it too much or you'll be all depressed again. Be happy!_

xxx

The sun was quickly setting, casting its rays out into the horizon. Touko smiled as Pansage, followed by Unfezant and Emboar walked out of the Nimbasa gym. She had spent the past two hours in the Amusement Park, hoping to forget about what happened with Cheren.

Hearing his confession like that surprised her. He had never shown any signs of being infatuated/in love with her but this was Cheren, he hardly showed any signs of emotion. She couldn't help but remember their journey throughout Unova though. Every time she was with Cheren and the two of them spotted N, he would become quite angry and his eyes would narrow. Touko had thought it was because N's ideals clashed with Cheren's but now she wasn't so sure, it seemed more like Cheren was jealous, but why?

"Sage, pansage!" _Don't think about it. C'mon, play with us, Touko!_

A wider smile popped up on her face as Pansage dragged her toward the game booths, leaving Emboar and Unfezant to watch the bags. Stoutland and Zebstrika had gone off somewhere in the Amusement Park to relax, not wanting to join the others in playing "silly games".

xxx

"Pansage, are you finished yet? It's getting late."

He shook his head and smiled, pointing his finger in the direction of the Ferris wheel. "Pan pansage pan." _Just one more ride. Let's go on that one._

Seeing the Ferris wheel reminded Touko of her first ride on it, with N. When N had disclosed to her that he was the King of Team Plasma, she had been shocked. After the initial shock had worn off, she felt betrayed by him. Of course, now she knew he had no choice in the matter but that didn't help back then.

Noticing the look of reminiscence on Touko's face, Pansage grinned and dragged the trainer over to the Ferris wheel. All of Touko's other Pokémon were back in their Pokéballs, exhausted from playing, except for Unfezant who kept watch over the bags filled with souvenirs from the musical.

"Alright, fine but this is the last one, okay?"

The grass monkey nodded his head and beamed at her.

xxx

Pansage sat next to Touko as the Ferris wheel started up and climbed into the night sky. The sun had finally set and the moon had emerged. Only a few people were on the Ferris wheel this late at night and Touko felt relaxed.

As they went higher and higher, Touko stood and pressed herself up against the glass to get a better look at the scenery beneath them. An array of stars twinkled and shimmered up in the sky and the many streetlamps shone like tiny jewels down in the streets of Nimbasa. This was the first time Touko had ever seen such a sight and she revelled in it.

The grass monkey smiled happily as he watched his trainer enjoy herself. This was also the first time Pansage had gotten to see such a sight but he didn't bother to enjoy it. There was something else for him to do...

Looking out the glass in the other direction, Pansage scanned the night sky for a white Pokémon. Unbeknownst to the green haired teen, Pansage had noticed him there the previous night. Although he hadn't seen what N did, he knew N was the reason Touko woke up feeling more cheerful, even if she didn't know it. All Pansage wanted (he was sure the others, especially Unfezant, felt the same) was for Touko to be happy. They all knew N's absence and his departure made their trainer depressed and took away her purpose in life, leaving her dazed and confused, to stumble through life.

His rather large ears twitched and he listened carefully. The faint sound of the flapping of wings echoed through the silent air, filling Pansage with excitement.

The Ferris wheel stopped as it reached its highest point, letting its passengers enjoy the fantastic night view. Touko gasped as she saw Nimbasa from a different point of view. "It's so beautiful, Pansage."

The monkey muttered an agreement but made no effort to look. He could already hear the steady beating of wings and within seconds, the vast white Pokémon came into view. Pansage couldn't figure out how Touko hadn't notice Reshiram getting closer and closer, it was such an obvious sight!

Still getting distracted by the brilliant night view, Touko remained oblivious as Reshiram paused beside the Ferris wheel. Pansage waved at the green haired teen and he smiled back. Looking at Touko and N, Pansage wondered if it would be a good idea to tell Touko...

"You're not even paying attention to me, are you Pansage?" Touko asked, exasperation lacing her tone. She turned away from the glass to scold the monkey when she let out a gasp.

Her eyes bulged out at the scene of the elegant legendary and the green haired teen. "N," she whispered.

He smiled at her and beckoned for her to join him. Stunned by the sight of him, she couldn't move and just shook her head. "This is just a dream, isn't it Pansage? I'll wake up any minute now and find myself back in the Pokémon Center in my room."

Pansage shook his head and, as gently as he could, shot seeds at her, making her flinch. "Pansage pan." _If you were asleep than that wouldn't have hurt._

"This can't be real..."

The Ferris wheel started up again, moving slowly as it completed its round. As Touko exited the ride with Pansage following, N dismounted from Reshiram, returning the legendary to its Pokéball and greeted her at its entrance.

"Touko," he breathed, enjoying the sound of her name on his tongue.

Her head snapped up in the direction of his voice and she stared. Pansage nodded at the green haired teen and walked away, giving them space and time to talk alone.

N's long legs ate up the gap between them and in a blink of an eye he was standing in front of her. Looking down at Touko, his emerald eyes bore into her bright blue ones. They stood like that for a while, neither of them knowing what to say.

"...Why have you returned?" Touko finally whispered; her voice so soft that he had to strain to make out her words. She broke their gaze and took a step back, hanging her head.

A flash of disappointment and sorrow flowed through him, making him flinch. He didn't know what he had expected her to say but _this_ reaction was not what he had in mind. He imagined her to be happy, glad that he was back or angry that he had abandoned her in the first place.

Touko felt her knees go weak as she waited for his response. Her heartbeat increased along with her breathing as she tried to calm herself. For weeks she had imagined finding N and seeing him again. How that he was right in front of her, she didn't know what to do.

The silence stretched out between them and Touko's legs gave out, causing her to fall. Before she collapsed onto the ground, N caught her, holding her gently by her elbows. Instead of feeling the coldness of the ground and feeling a person's warmth, Touko looked up, right into N's emerald eyes and gasped.

Memories of the past flashed in her mind like a camera, showing her all the times the two of them had been together. The last scene that played was when he left on Reshiram and she had fallen to the ground, feeling waves of anguish wash over her. What now...?

"Why are you here?" Touko asked again, directing her gaze at him. She had shaken his arms off and now stood a ways away from him. She couldn't trust herself with him so near. Her emotions raged and her mind refused to try to comprehend any of it.

xxx

"Fezant unfe," the proud Pokémon grumbled as the grass monkey approached her. _You sure took your time._

Pansage smiled at her and sat down besides her, leaning against the bags. Unfezant paused, looking around before turning to the monkey questioningly. "Fezant?" _Where's Touko?_

"Sage pansage pan," he replied, pointing in the direction of the Ferris wheel. _Over there with her special someone. _

"Zant?" Unfezant cawed in surprise. _He's back?"_

The monkey nodded and told his friend to calm down. _They need time to talk, don't you think so?_

Unfezant rolled her eyes gestured with her wing, grumbling under her breath. _As if there's anything to talk about. He's hurt her without knowing it and he expects her to be _happy_ that he's back?_

xxx

"I... don't know, Touko," N finally replied, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his pants. His voice was also soft but unlike hers, she could hear every single word he said. Her heart jumped for joy at the sound of his voice but she willed herself to not react.

"What do you mean by that?" she questioned, deliberately looking away.

Taking in a deep breath, N took a step toward her. "After I left, I didn't know what to do. I had no purpose in life anymore, none worthwhile, at least. You showed me that trainers treated their Pokémon like how they treated their human friends. You showed me that not all Pokémon feel the same way that the Pokémon Fath- Ghetsis showed me did. My ideal world meant nothing anymore. All I wanted was for Pokémon to live happy lives, to be free from pain and hurt. But now I see that they _are _happy, especially when they're with their trainers. I don't want to torture them and force them to leave."

"So what do you plan to do now?" Touko murmured, stunned at N's explanation. She hadn't known how much she had changed his ideals by, but she was glad. Trainers loved their Pokémon and their Pokémon loved them back, they deserved to be together.

"I don't know. All I knew was that I belong in Unova and that I wanted to return," N said. He looked at her and gave her a small smile, warming her beneath her skin. "I wanted to see you again."

"M-me? Why me?" she stuttered, surprised at his confession. She still had yet to determine if the two of them were friends, if their relationship went beyond rivals and enemies. She wished, with all her heart that it did.

"There's something about you that draws me to you. The way you treat your Pokémon is different compared to all the other trainers I've met. You're special, Touko."

Touko's cheeks flared up as a blush crept up the side of her face and she was glad it was night, otherwise N would see her blushing, possibly taking her reaction the wrong way. "I still don't understand, N. Why have you come back?"

His smile faded and his lips thinned out into a line as he thought over what he wanted to say. "Perhaps I never wanted to leave in the first place."

"T-then why did you-"

"I couldn't stay, Touko! My Fath- Ghetsis had just been arrested and even though Alder had forgiven me for what I did, I couldn't forgive myself. I was nothing but a puppet for him, easily used and manipulated. That Castle held all my memories as a child and I wanted to break free from it but it was also my only home. I had no one to turn to, nowhere to go."

"But you said you left to figure out what you wanted to do with your life," she exclaimed.

"It was just an excuse. I couldn't stay there and there was nowhere in Unova for me to go without being recognized," N stated. "I'm sorry, Touko."

"What are you sorry for? You did nothing wrong!"

"That may be true but I'm still sorry. I've hurt you, haven't I?"

Touko froze, feeling her heart beating faster than it ever had before. How had he known? "H-how did you..."

"I can see it in your eyes. Your emotions are contradicting with your thoughts. You're glad to see me again but also feeling hurt at the memories I bring back. Am I right?"

She gave him a brief nod. Everything he said was true.

"Touko, there's one thing I want to ask you," N said. His own heart was beating fast and his breathing was uneven. His voice was off from its usual demeanour as unease pounded his chest. "Can we be friends?"

Touko blinked before turning her bright blue eyes on him. That was all he wanted to ask her? Joy erupted through her body and she fought to keep a grin from breaking out on her face. "Yes, I would love to have you as a friend, N," she replied simply. The look she gave him said all that needed to be said between the two of them.

xxx

"Unfe fezant feh?" Unfezant questioned, anxiously waiting for her trainer to appear. _Do you think we should check on her to make sure he hasn't done anything to her?_

"Pansage pan," he replied. _He won't do anything to harm her. Reshiram will make sure of that. _

"Fezant feh," she scoffed. _I don't trust that dragon. _

"Sage pansage... pan!" _But she's a legendary and...look!_

The pair turned and stared into the horizon. The Ferris wheel continued to move in a circular motion even though night had approached long ago. Even from far away, they could make out two figures riding on it.

"Pansage pan pansage sage," the grass monkey stated happily. _I told you he wouldn't ever hurt Touko. They look happy up there._

xxx

The two teens sat beside each other on the Ferris wheel, neither of them saying anything. Memories of the last time they had ridden the Ferris wheel together washed over them, making Touko grimace and N flinch.

"This ride is better than the last one, isn't it?" Touko asked jokingly, trying to ease the tension between the two of them. It was a last minute decision for them to ride the Ferris wheel. It was getting late and Touko had planned to return to the Pokémon Center to get some sleep before heading back to Nuvema Town the next day.

N had caught the strap of her bag as she turned to walk away and wondered if it was possible for them to ride the Ferris wheel first. She couldn't deny his request and together they got on.

"What do you plan to do now, N?" she asked, breaking the silence again. The ride was fast approaching its end and after that confrontation, she felt awkward to be around him with silence filling the air.

"I'm not sure. I plan to return to the Castle though, it's my only home," N replied quietly.

The Ferris wheel stopped and the pair of them got off. They started walking toward the entrance of the Amusement Park and neither of them spoke. Unfezant and Pansage spotted them and quieted down, looking at their trainer for further instructions.

"Thanks Unfezant, I can carry those. Return," Touko stated, aiming the Pokéball at the proud Pokémon. A red light emitted from the ball and Unfezant disappeared into it, leaving Pansage still out. She took out another Pokéball and also returned Pansage before picking up the bags.

As they got nearer to the entrance, Touko turned to N. "I guess this is where we part ways. I'm going back to Nuvema Town to figure out what I want to do," she told him.

He nodded, signalling that he had heard her but didn't reply, letting silence drift between them. Finally, N asked, "Whatever happened to your dream, Touko?"

"I lied," she replied simply. "I said it in hopes of making you feel better. After the battle, I've been wandering through Unova in hopes of finding you. I had no idea what to do with myself and I still don't. That's why I'm going back home."

N looked at her and the corners of his lips twitched, curving into a small smile. "I guess in that respect, we're quite similar. We both don't know what to do with our lives."

Touko shrugged her shoulders and her gripped tightened around the handle of the bags.

"Would like you to come to the Castle with me? As my friend, that is. I-I wouldn't mind having someone with me. That place holds many of my memories."

She thought for a moment and smiled at him. Her heart fluttered at the thought of being with him, sending waves of happiness rolling through her body. "As your friend, I would say yes, but I would still like to go home first. After all, I bought all these souvenirs to give to my mom," Touko replied with a grin.

N's shoulders relaxed and he smiled back at her. Turning to face the entrance, they both walked out and onto the streets of Nimbasa. "Shall I wait for you here while you go home?" he asked.

She shook her head, no. "There's no need for that. I want you to come with me."

"A-are you sure about that? What would your mother say? I am the person that most trainers in Unova hate."

"That would be Ghetsis, not you and besides, my mom is pretty open-minded. She won't mind, unless you attempt certain activities with me," Touko said in a suggestive tone, causing N to blush. He looked away, much to Touko's amusement, to let his face cool when she caught a glimpse of his necklace, dangling from his neck, which reminded her...

Reaching into her bag, Touko pulled out something that had given her hope and made her feel sad at the same time: N's keychain. She dangled it in front of him before taking his hand in hers and placing it in his palm. "I can finally return it to you," she whispered softly, a smooth contrast to her earlier teasing tone.

That keychain had been with her ever since N had left up until now. When she had thoughts of never seeing him again and started crying, she would run her hand along the keychain until her pounding heart would stop.

"Y-you kept it all this time?" N asked, disbelief shining in his emerald eyes. After he had flown away on Reshiram and noticed his keychain was gone, he hadn't bothered going back to the Castle to retrieve it as he thought Touko would still be there. When he returned to Unova, retrieving the keychain had slipped from his thoughts completely. He never thought it was in her possession.

"Of course," she replied softly, smiling.

"Thank you," he murmured, forming a fist around the object. It felt cool in his warm hand and he felt shivers running up and down his body at feeling its familiar texture. "Thank you, Touko."

She smiled at him again before taking his hand in hers once more, pulling him in the direction of the Pokémon Center. "Tomorrow you're going to Nuvema Town with me. Afterwards we can go to the Castle. Right, my friend?" Touko declared.

"Right," N responded, feeling his own lips curving up into a happy smile. It had been too long since he had felt positive emotions within himself. It felt good, really good.

"C'mon then!"

**A/N: First of all, thanks to everyone that had bothered reading/reviewing this story. Every time I get a review or a fave or alert for this story, I get really happy. So I would like to thank all of you :D**

**Second, I apologize if N seems OOC. I wasn't quite sure how to write his character or how to approach this chapter. I hope you guys like how this ended up though ^_^ This chapter was **_**supposed **_**to end after Pansage and Unfezant talked to each other but it didn't seem quite right to me, so I ended up writing another one thousand words of text XD **

**By the way, the Cheren thing will be explained and explored in future chapters. Just pretend there was something going on between Touko and Cheren **_**before **_**the start of this story (like during the journey). I'm sorry if this chapter seemed to focus on Checkmateshipping, it's one of my favourites :3 **

**Happy Leafing~!**


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